It's been a rough week. I tried really hard to manage without the being on the prednisone, but I only lasted a few days. I only felt better on Tuesday after therapy which is when I wrote my last blog so I was trying to be optimistic.
On Wednesday I was back to how I was feeling before. Thursday was even worse. I started losing my appetite so I kind of had a feeling I was going to be having a flare again. And I was right. Thursday night I could barely get around the house. I tried doing everything I could even though I was in a lot of pain. I tried stretching, icing, took a shower to relax, used a softball to loosen up my muscles, but nothing was working. I finally went to bed hoping I would feel better for my appointment in the morning.
Oh boy was I wrong. Friday morning I was so much worse and I felt like I was very close to making my way back to my worst point of my flare that happened about a month ago. Thankfully, I had an appointment with my OB Friday morning. Everyone was working and I didn't know how I was going to make it to my appointment; I could barely manage to get around the house I didn't know how I was going to drive myself or walk to get to my appointment. Fortunately, my father-in-law was on vacation and was pretty much my chauffeur all day.
My ultra sound was the first part of my appointment. I pretty much have an ultra sound almost every time I go because of my autoimmune disease so they can monitor me and the baby. The nurse noticed I wasn't doing so well and helped me slowly walk back to the room and up onto the table. I dreaded laying on my back becasue any pressure to my SI joint makes it so much worse especially when I'm already hurting. Sometimes it helps if I bend one of my legs. This helped, but only a little bit. My father-in-law definitely enjoyed getting to see Jackson during the ultra sound. Unfortunately, I didn't get to enjoy it as much as he did. As I was laying on my back, I began overheating. My skin felt very hot and my face began sweating. It also didn't help that she was pushing on my stomach. Once she realized I wasn't feeling well she quickly finished up. She helped me walk to the room for my next part of the appointment and got some water for me.
The next nurse walked in and said,"I heard you're not doing so well. Will you be able to let me check your weight and give me a urine sample." I sighed because I knew it was going to be a task and told her I would try to do what I could. She helped me walk to the scale and stood outside the bathroom door just in case and helped me walk all the way back to the room.
At this point, I was in even more pain. I had definitely aggravated my lower back from all the activity. While I waited for my doctor to come in the room I had to literally lean to the right side the whole entire time to put as little pressure as possible on my left side.
I think by now the whole office knew I was struggling. The first thing my doctor said was, "I heard you're not doing too well." Originally my Rheumatology doctor proscribed the prednisone for me so he's the one that decided the dosages and how to taper me off. I informed her that I had been off the prednisone since Monday and that I started having a flare the night before. She basically told me that I wouldn't be able to manage without the prednisone and that I would need to be on it the rest of my pregnancy. I was okay with that because she was right.
We discussed that with me being on the prednisone the rest of the time that Jackson and I will both definitely be much bigger than if I were not taking it. Apparently there is also sugar in prednisone so between the weight gain and the sugar I will most likely be a pregnant diabetic. I guess this is also common and they usually test pregnant women for this anyway. I drank the really sugary drink so I could get my blood drawn for them to do the tests.
I had to wait an hour before I could get my blood drawn so my father-in-law and I drove across the street to the CVS to get my new prescription filled. By the time we were done at CVS and getting my blood drawn it was time for my next appointment with therapy. My doctor at therapy also could tell I wasn't doing so well.
I was already in pain because of my flare and I had a pretty active morning so it was really hard for me to get around at this point. He asked me different questions trying to find the root of my problems. Where does it hurt? Does it hurt more when you push off with your left leg? Does it hurt to lay a certain way? What does it feel like if you bend this way? He'd push on different muscles and then have me walk to see what made me feel better after each time. This time he actually pushed on my lower back directly where it hurt. I know as painful as it was he was actually helping. I just wouldn't see the affects of it that day.
By the time I finally got back home I was so physically drained. I still felt pretty bad that night. Saturday morning I woke up and felt so much better. My father-in-law said he could tell I felt better because I wasn't moving as slow and the expressions on my face looked so much better. I still was in pain on Saturday, but I noticed a major improvement.
What surprises me is how I can go from one extreme to another in a matter of no time. I felt like 75% better yesterday, but this morning was a different story. From the moment I woke up I knew it was going to be a bad day. Just laying there my whole left side was in pain. I've been up since 6:30 am because I was so uncomfortable I couldn't go back to sleep. When I finally got the courage to get out of bed I got breakfast and took my medicine. It's almost 1pm and I am just now starting to somewhat feel better.
It's very frustrating having an autoimmune disease that can be so unpredictable, especially when I have medication I can take to make me feel at my full potential, but I can't take it now. It's hard to mentally and physically prepare myself for a flare. It's also very draining. When I feel that bad it takes a lot out of me. It's also frustrating struggling to get around and feeling so helpless. I'm hoping that being back on the prednisone things will start getting better. It's definitely a wait and see process.
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Case of the Mondays
And just when I thought I was starting to feel better... Monday happened. Everyone dreads Mondays because it's the beginning of a new work/school week. I was dreading Monday because it was the first day I was going to be off the prednisone. Sunday was a little rough for me so I was anticipating Monday to be bad.
It was a little bit of a struggle to get out of bed on Monday, but not impossible. I could definitely tell I was no longer on the prednisone. Usually it takes me a while to get moving in the mornings, but on Monday I felt like I was dragging around all day. The only times I was out of bed was for a meal, to go to the bathroom, to refill my water bottle or to get an ice pack. I tried to do these things occasionally so I wasn't laying in bed all day. The longer I was up the more I could feel the pain in my lower back intensify. I used the iced packs a lot hoping it would help with the swelling/inflammation.
Monday was also my first day trying the supplements. With the prednisone it usually took a couple of hours to kick in and I would start feeling better. So when a couple of hours rolled around and I wasn't feeling any better I began to feel discouraged. My mom pointed out that it may take a few days for the supplements to get through my system and so I may not see any affect right away (that is if they even work). Monday night was even a struggle. I did a lot of tossing and turning. It has been really hard for me to get comfortable lately and I am up often throughout the night.
This morning was about the same as Monday when I woke up. I had to get moving today because I had to get to therapy. They could tell I was having a hard time too. It's funny how working on different muscles can make such a difference in how I feel. The muscles in my legs are trying to compensate for the pain in my back. I'm unknowingly walking differently to try to avoid the pain which puts stress on my legs, along with the weight gain. Everything is connected so when my muscles tighten it affects my lower back. It's like a constant chain reaction. Matt [my doctor] and his whole team are wonderful because I always feel better when I leave. (If you live in the area and you have any type of injury, pregnant or not, I highly recommend them!)
Last night when I was trying to fall asleep, I kept thinking 3 months.. 3 months... That's a long time! How am I going to make it through these next 3 months? As much as I try to stay positive, it's really hard because not being able to predict a flare or prevent it freaks me out. I think I am afraid it's going to get as bad as it did. It only took a day for it to get that bad, so if I'm kind of hurting today that means it could go either way tomorrow.
Fortunately, I came across this:
"Most people give up because they look at how much further they have left to go, instead of seeing how far they've come."
Giving up is not an option in my case, but that's besides the point. It's the fact that I was thinking about how much further I have to go, instead of how far I've come. I've gone 6 months without any medication, besides a few weeks on the prednisone. The fact that I have made it this far means I am only in the home stretch!
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
The Next Step
This week is my last week on the Prednisone. I was kind of concerned going down on my dosage this week just because it has made a difference with reducing my flare. I tend to be a worrier sometimes, but I think I have a right to worry about this because I want to be prepared just in case my flare isn't gone or it comes back.
Over the weekend, I was doing much better so I got out of the house a little bit and was more active. It's really hard to find the line between being too active and not active enough. I don't know if it's the decrease in my dosage, if I was too active this past weekend or a little of both because I have felt my lower back in a little bit of pain. Don't get me wrong it is not even close to as bad as what it was, but I have been a little apprehensive with everything I have done these past few days.
As a part of my precautions, I went to a few stores this weekend. My mom found a blog online from a woman who was pregnant with the same autoimmune disease as me. She tried a few supplements to take care of her inflammation so I think I'm going to give it a try. I know that just because it worked for her doesn't mean it will work for me, but I've got my fingers crossed!
Of course before buying all of these supplements I checked with my OBGYN first to make sure it wouldn't harm Jackson. We found everything we needed at The Vitamin Shoppe. Just in case someone with a similar situation comes across my blog, I'll share what we ended up buying. We got:
On a positive note, I can finally put on my own shoes again. I don't know if I ever mentioned that in my other blogs, but I couldn't bend over or sit and lift my legs up because it was too painful. I also kind of got away from doing my stretches because it was too painful and I am finally able to do most of them again.
For now the plan is to continue the Prednisone for 4 more days and then I'll start the supplements. I have therapy twice a week for the rest of the month. I'm trying to do my exercises twice a day and ice at least twice a day. I'm wearing my back brace everyday. And some how trying to find the thin line between being just active enough so I don't become tight/stiff and I don't over do it.
Every time I feel Jackson move it fascinates me all over again and it reminds me that everything I am going through is going to be worth it! I just have to keep tackling each day one at a time.
Over the weekend, I was doing much better so I got out of the house a little bit and was more active. It's really hard to find the line between being too active and not active enough. I don't know if it's the decrease in my dosage, if I was too active this past weekend or a little of both because I have felt my lower back in a little bit of pain. Don't get me wrong it is not even close to as bad as what it was, but I have been a little apprehensive with everything I have done these past few days.
As a part of my precautions, I went to a few stores this weekend. My mom found a blog online from a woman who was pregnant with the same autoimmune disease as me. She tried a few supplements to take care of her inflammation so I think I'm going to give it a try. I know that just because it worked for her doesn't mean it will work for me, but I've got my fingers crossed!
Of course before buying all of these supplements I checked with my OBGYN first to make sure it wouldn't harm Jackson. We found everything we needed at The Vitamin Shoppe. Just in case someone with a similar situation comes across my blog, I'll share what we ended up buying. We got:
- liquid Omega-3 - it has a lemon flavor (the guy let me try it at the store - it didn't have a fishy taste!)
- Ginger Trips - it's a sugar free gumlet (not sure about this ones taste, haven't tried it yet)
- Turmeric Extract - its 95% Curcumin. This one is supposed to be the BIG one that helps. Its supposed to help reduce inflammation.
- Magnesium Chelate (100 mg) - the guy at the store recommended this one when we told him my situation. Its supposed to help with things like leg cramps.
On a positive note, I can finally put on my own shoes again. I don't know if I ever mentioned that in my other blogs, but I couldn't bend over or sit and lift my legs up because it was too painful. I also kind of got away from doing my stretches because it was too painful and I am finally able to do most of them again.
For now the plan is to continue the Prednisone for 4 more days and then I'll start the supplements. I have therapy twice a week for the rest of the month. I'm trying to do my exercises twice a day and ice at least twice a day. I'm wearing my back brace everyday. And some how trying to find the thin line between being just active enough so I don't become tight/stiff and I don't over do it.
Every time I feel Jackson move it fascinates me all over again and it reminds me that everything I am going through is going to be worth it! I just have to keep tackling each day one at a time.
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Eventful Weekend
For everyone else this past weekend was Labor Day Weekend, but for me it was the weekend of MY WEDDING! Planning and having a wedding in general is exhausting, but being 24 weeks pregnant while doing all this takes even more out of you! I was extremely worried about how things would be especially with my flare happening a few weeks ago. I honestly thought my dad would be pushing me down the isle in a wheel chair!
Friday, I went to therapy, which was a good thing. I was feeling good by Friday afternoon and I was ready for the weekend. We had our rehearsal Friday evening and we all went back to the hall to decorate. Needless to say when 11pm rolled around I was calling it quits and ready to go to bed! I knew Saturday was going to be a long day. When I went to bed my back was bothering me a little bit and I was really hoping I would be okay when I woke up Saturday morning.
I woke up at 7am on Saturday. I was a little stiff and so the first thing I did was take my medicine and iced for 20 minutes. I put on my back brace (to wear until I put on my dress) and I started to get worried when I was moving slow. I tried not to think about it because mornings are usually the worst part of my days. My bridesmaids did a great job at helping me. They made sure I was comfortable and relaxed as much as possible. The ceremony was pretty quick and after tons of pictures we were on to the reception. At this point, I was finally feeling alright.
I wanted to enjoy myself as much as possible because it was MY wedding day. I had Tylenol Extra Strength, ice packs, my back brace, and pillows all for back up when I needed them. Of course, I ended up needing almost all of these things. I kind of wish we had a camera for when my sisters were trying to help me put on my back brace in the bathroom with this big huge wedding dress going everywhere. I also ended up sitting on the pillows most of the night for support. I came prepared and I survived!
My night was even later on Saturday. The limo didn't come and get Stephen and I until midnight. A lot of people were asking how I was still standing and honestly I asked myself the same thing. I have no clue! I'm a trooper, I guess.
Sunday was a different story. I struggled hardcore getting out of bed that morning. Stephen and I stayed in a hotel and let me tell you our hotel was huge and that was the longest walk ever to the reception desk! I took my medicine as soon as I got home and I went back to sleep. I felt a little better waking up the second time around. I spent most of my day recovering from my eventful weekend.
It is now Thursday and I have been recovering all week from my wedding weekend. Therapy definitely helped on Tuesday. I had a massage and they got most of the knots out of my back and my legs. I think most of my pain from my flare is finally gone. I'm mostly just achy and tight/stiff now. I'll take both of those any day over the pain I was experiencing.
Even though I am just now starting to feel better from the weekend, everything turned out better than I expected! I was prepared for the worst, but thankfully I was lucky. It was a beautiful wedding spent with amazing family and friends. I can't wait to get our pictures back and share our wonderful day with everyone! My wedding will definitely be a memorable one!
Friday, I went to therapy, which was a good thing. I was feeling good by Friday afternoon and I was ready for the weekend. We had our rehearsal Friday evening and we all went back to the hall to decorate. Needless to say when 11pm rolled around I was calling it quits and ready to go to bed! I knew Saturday was going to be a long day. When I went to bed my back was bothering me a little bit and I was really hoping I would be okay when I woke up Saturday morning.
I woke up at 7am on Saturday. I was a little stiff and so the first thing I did was take my medicine and iced for 20 minutes. I put on my back brace (to wear until I put on my dress) and I started to get worried when I was moving slow. I tried not to think about it because mornings are usually the worst part of my days. My bridesmaids did a great job at helping me. They made sure I was comfortable and relaxed as much as possible. The ceremony was pretty quick and after tons of pictures we were on to the reception. At this point, I was finally feeling alright.
I wanted to enjoy myself as much as possible because it was MY wedding day. I had Tylenol Extra Strength, ice packs, my back brace, and pillows all for back up when I needed them. Of course, I ended up needing almost all of these things. I kind of wish we had a camera for when my sisters were trying to help me put on my back brace in the bathroom with this big huge wedding dress going everywhere. I also ended up sitting on the pillows most of the night for support. I came prepared and I survived!
My night was even later on Saturday. The limo didn't come and get Stephen and I until midnight. A lot of people were asking how I was still standing and honestly I asked myself the same thing. I have no clue! I'm a trooper, I guess.
Sunday was a different story. I struggled hardcore getting out of bed that morning. Stephen and I stayed in a hotel and let me tell you our hotel was huge and that was the longest walk ever to the reception desk! I took my medicine as soon as I got home and I went back to sleep. I felt a little better waking up the second time around. I spent most of my day recovering from my eventful weekend.
It is now Thursday and I have been recovering all week from my wedding weekend. Therapy definitely helped on Tuesday. I had a massage and they got most of the knots out of my back and my legs. I think most of my pain from my flare is finally gone. I'm mostly just achy and tight/stiff now. I'll take both of those any day over the pain I was experiencing.
Even though I am just now starting to feel better from the weekend, everything turned out better than I expected! I was prepared for the worst, but thankfully I was lucky. It was a beautiful wedding spent with amazing family and friends. I can't wait to get our pictures back and share our wonderful day with everyone! My wedding will definitely be a memorable one!
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